I wrote the following for a Creative Non-Fiction class in 2008. I had taken a hiatus from school and writing in general and was just getting back into the swing of things. I don't remember what the assignment was, but I do remember sitting down at the computer and it all came rushing out. That's what I love about writing: the blind release.
I like to talk about things no one else wants to talk about. The following shows that a bit. It also shows that there is way under people's skin than just muscle and bone.
Two Sizes Too Small
She
has never been an ugly girl. Her
personality outshines anyone in a room and she has the biggest heart in three
counties. She is the only daughter and
the middle child between two boys. She
has, whether she will admit it or not, been a daddy’s girl from the day she was
born. She can bake anything with her
eyes closed and always answers her phone, no matter the day or the night.
But, she’s never had it easy.
In life, as a society, we have seen the cruelty or
people. We have seen people shun others for
many things-religions, political stances, or lifestyle choices. We have watched in horror as some of our
veterans, who fought for our freedom and do not have any unhealthy
dependencies, live in hell on a street corner.
They beg for our compassion, our help, and we turn a blind eye. We watch animals, on their death bed, look at
us from their cages and beg us with their eyes, “It’s too late for me, but
please don’t let another suffer.” We see
children peek out at us from behind their mother’s legs, dirty, starved, and
cold, while she exchanges cash for her fix.
And, in the midst of all this disgust, the world still
finds a way to turn their noses up at people who can’t control what they look
like. Never mind that they have had
every medical test known to man, that they've tried every diet (sometimes
twice), and they've exercised until they fall over in tears because they want
it so bad. As a society, we still find a
way to make them feel like garbage.
They
want so bad to look like you they can
taste it. They stand in dressing rooms
and choke back the tears because the same thing they tried on last week, doesn't fit now. Even though they have
watched every thing that has gone in their mouth and they have exercised twice
a day for a week just so they could fit into that one item. They walk out and look at their best friend
and throw the garment over the rack and say, “Whatever. I didn't like it anyway.”
But
the best friend knows that they just heard a heart break on the other side of
that dressing room door.
She
has a name. She has a social security
number. She pays her taxes. She is an American citizen. She has two cats and a handful of friends. She works hard for what she has.
But
America shuns her because she’s overweight at no fault of her own.
She’s
beautiful on the inside and that comes through to the outside. She carries herself well and she takes the
time to look nice every morning, but American still shuns her.
America
makes her buy two seats on an airplane.
America
makes her pay more for her clothes.
America
takes one look at her in a restaurant and automatically assumes she wants
larger portions.
She
has had doors slammed in her face, she has been made to look a fool by men,
women have scowled at her and talked behind her back and the general population
of the world turns their nose up at her.
But
she still smiles and she still laughs despite all the torture she’s
endured.
She
still gets’s up in the morning and contributes to the society that treats her
like crap.
Why?
Because
that’s what she’s supposed to do.
Because
those people don’t matter.
What
matters to her is that she can still wake up in the morning, feed her cat’s,
and enjoy the sunshine another day. What
matter’s to her is that she is loved
by her family and her friends and that they are there for her no matter what
size she may be.
The
rest of the world can go to hell as far as she’s concerned.
And
it probably will if this kind of across-the-board mentality doesn't stop.
Umm.. I absolutely LOVE this! SO MUCH! I love to sit in coffee shops and write whatever is on my mind kind of like this. This writing style is incredible.
ReplyDeleteLove your blog girl!
http://haleybrianna.blogspot.com
Haley, thank you! That was so sweet! I am heading over to check yours out now! Happy to have you here!
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